Cornelia H., age 25, North Carolina

A dull day, cloudy & gloomy. The coffee this morning had a chicken feather in it. I do think we have the dirtiest cooks ever was in the world. I often wish there was not a negro in the world. These fret my life away nearly. I sometimes think it would be a relief to lie down in the quiet grave where trouble never comes & then another & better thought rises within & says live for your children for you know what it is to have a step mother. Oh! God spare me to raise my children. Give me wisdom to raise them in fear & admonition of Thee & when it seemeth good in Thy sight remove me from this world of care & trouble. Pa & Berry came this evening. Had two matches, two mules & a mare he had purchased in Ten. All well at Neilsons.

*(Fear in North Carolina: The Civil War Journals and Letters of the Henry Family, Eds. Karen L. Clinard and Richard Russell, used with permission.)