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June 7

Crisis, age 45, Martha’s Vineyard
June 7, 2006

9.20am I awake and am shocked to discover I’ve slept for eleven and a half hours. Struth! And I feel like I could do more. Wow. It’s torrential rain outside as it has been all night, still pretty grey. And when I start telling myself I need to do more I will just think of this sleep, cos for me to be sleeping this much I am obviously still exhausted. I did wake briefly at 6am, and dismissed the idea of getting up. Thank god. I think I’ll wrap up a bit and go drink my tea on the porch and enjoy the rain. And of course I was full of dreams. Maybe I resolved them all and didn’t need to bring them into the day. So I’m on my porch with a big cup of Russian Caravan tea, yummy, and in a big woolly jumper watching the rain come lashing down. It’s fantastic. What a treat. I know one dream was about a musician, Joe. I didn’t know how old he was, I know he looked rather weatherbeaten. I’d seen him play a few times, and I don’t think we’d really spoken. On this particular occasion he did speak out. I don’t know whether it was to a few people or just to me. Ah! before that I’d seen details of him written down somewhere and I saw that he’d been born in 1950, so was a full ten years older than me. Then he spoke. He charted his journey into the depths of addiction, being lost in Hades, seeing a spring blossom, understanding there could be hope after all, and his emergence from that place into where he was now where he wasn’t, as he put it, a fully flowering bloom but was so far along the road to that place that he might as well be incandescent he was so fully formed. His beauty became much more apparent to me on having heard his tale of loss, hope and redemption. I could see what he had done and the love that sprang from that work. And I could see what a much more whole person he was as a consequence of having done that work. I would go up and speak to him and tell him I had appreciated his words. Meanwhile, in the back of my mind, I could still see autumn trees, no, post autumn, stripped of their leaves and beauty, huddling and shivering in the cold light of day. I wondered if this were still some of his shadow material I could see in the background, the nakedness, the fear, the lack of protection, the (perceived) lack of beauty, the isolation, the fear that winter would go on and on, the fear that blossoming would never arrive. And yet, because I saw it in the background, almost as a silhouette, did that mean it was present or just a memory lingering, holding on with it until it was time to just fade away? I don’t know. Nor would I. I was glad that this man had spoken of his fear, his journey, his eventual welcoming of hisself. This was the kind of animus I respected, the one who really could engage in the journey with himself, and pull himself out of the pit rather than declaiming to one and all that they should pull him out of the pit because he had done enough. And I didn’t have any hope, desires, or expectations of him; I just had the desire to acknowledge him where he was, I didn’t have a gleam in my eye regarding any kind of interaction with him, I just wanted to thank him for being open to his story, and willing to offer it out to others so that we may see that recovery is indeed possible and that is possible to completely change directions in our lives. Personally I felt my heart open up to him which made me realise how closed I was usually to the human race, as my heart had creaked and moaned as it expanded to take in the pain and love of anothers journey. I felt like we were two souls meeting one another. God, this is so wonderful to be sat here, with the rain pouring down outside. I am outside too, but undercover. What a privilege. Two trees have sprung into full bloom, partially blocking my view of Sunset Lake, although I just have to tilt myself sideways to have a magnificent view, so that’s not too hard, is it? And today I could do nothing. But my house is an absolute tip and I’m completely resistant to cleaning it. I did start the process of sifting through papers the other day but there’s a long way to go. But it has to be done cos Cathy arrives on Saturday. And the man still hasn’t delivered my newly purchased furniture, so that’s a drag. However, yesterday I bought loads of stuff, wood glue, hammer, etc, enamel paint for the bath so that I can get cracking on the household chores that need doing: I have four broken wooden chairs to mend, a bath to paint. I’ve hung my new mirror and a clock, although the clock may have to go as it has an audible tick. It’s in the dining room but I could hear it in the living room. Can’t be doing with that. So I’ve been up an hour and am still not showered, apart from where small holes in the roof of the porch let in small amounts of rain. And how beautiful it is just to sit and be here. I’d be tempted to just plan to completely stay in today but the film “Rockers” is showing at the Arts Exchange down the road, and although I’m sure I’ve seen it several hundred times (Gate Cinema), I fancy going to it. That’s at 7pm. And I have food enough in to not have to go out before then, so I can settle down to some real cleaning today. Great! It occurs to me if I didn’t drink an entire pot of caffeinated tea every morning maybe I’d feel my exhaustion much more, cos that is what I use to propel me into the day. But you know what? That’s fine. I’ve got all summer off, although I am recording an album in September or October. Maybe early October would be better, that would give me and Terry more time to rehearse. And yesterday I did spend a couple of hours in the studio singing. And then several hours, or ages anyway, on the internet. Dangerous stuff. Wow! The rain’s coming down even heavier,as though that were possible. But it is! Exciting! Just hope it’s not like this when Cathy arrives. So maybe I should set to work? Oh dear, I suppose so.

Laura M., age 16, North Carolina
June 7, 1998

Worked. Pat came and told me Casey likes me. DAMNIT. Casey came and said he wasn’t mad at me 4 acting stupid. Mom’s out of town. Saw Sean. Worked from 5:30-close with Lindsey. Casey, Courtney, Née, Melissas came 2 Reservoir and we did Sean’s love. Me (and Casey) drove in2 a ditch. Scary. Girls spent night at Courtney’s. AWESOME.

Laura M., age 15, North Carolina
June 7, 1997

Went to Farmers’ Market. Went to mall with Courtney and family. Watched first half of “Jerry McGuire.” Ate. Went to Shannon’s party. Really fun. Me and Crozier… :) Went to Courtney’s for the night. Bed at 1:00! Record for us. Want Mike.

Anna L., age 75, Illinois
June 7, 1960

Dyed a spread; couldn’t start the big spread as not enough dye. Mrs. B. had hair done, then to card club. She came over the wall and Edna took us to Amy’s in the eve. A good crowd and good time; played Bingo. Came home at 11:00. Had made a few cookies early P.M. Lo came at 5:00 went to funeral home for Mrs. Shufelt. Saw Elinor.

Marcy S., age 19, Tennessee 
June 7, 1944  

My pearls haven’t come yet. I’m trying not to get worried. Pop called Mr. Harris before I got up and he wants me tomorrow at 8am! I slept awhile longer and then got up. It was a perfectly beautiful day. I washed my hair and dried it outside. Mr. Harris told Pop that he’d like to see me at 1:30 today. Eek!! So I dried my hair and dressed. Just as I was leaving I found 2 letters at the door. One for me from Jim. I read it on the way down. He had received my Easter letter! I was early but went in and sat down. Presently Mr. H. came in his office from a back room and just as I was getting up, he dropped his glasses and broke them. Then he saw me — that should have finished him! :) He invited me in and I sat down. His office was in a mess — I wanted to grab a broom and duster and go to work! He asked if I wanted the experience or the job (meaning the money) and I said mainly the experience. He’s had a boy whom he paid $1 a day but he didn’t take shorthand. He said he’d do me right. He gave me an appraising look and said he thought I’d do fine — I told him I hadn’t had any experience. He’s a very jolly man and has a very hearty laugh. Said for me to come back Friday at 8:30 — if that weren’t too early! — ’cause he had to go to court tomorrow. I left, feeling much better. It was too early for Red Cross so I walked around and wore myself out. Met Mum, Betty and Mrs. Waterhouse coming down the street about 2. We went up to the Red Cross rooms which are just down the hall from Mr. H.’s office. Mum introduced Betty and I to the ladies and we set to work. We used cards that fold the bandages and make it much easier to roll them. I made 130 in 2 hours — the record! My card behaved very well, which probably explains it. I wore my new green skirt and white blouse and felt very classy. We were through at 4 and Mum helped Mrs. Davis pack up. Then Betty and I went by the library and I got The Last Time I Saw Paris. We had quite a conversation with Mrs. Goodwin. Then we went back through town by the P.O. Betty went in and I walked on up the street. I spied Margaret Hudson over by the Methodist Church so I went over and we talked till Betty came. M. was waiting for her Pop. We all talked and soon Betsy and Ann Ray came by and we all kidded. Then Mr. Hudson came and we all parted. Ann Ray walked up the hill with us. Got home about 5:30. After 6 I called Mary and made arrangements for tomorrow night. She told me some jokes and I thought she’d never hang up! She’s the limit! After supper Betty and I went up to call on Mother Lane. Mrs. Mildred was there but left soon. I thanked Mother Lane for the crocheted bag she gave me for graduation. We went inside and she showed us some pictures and then asked me to play. I rendered the “Aeolian” Etude and then we left a few minutes later and went up to Mrs. Mildred’s and Julian’s. Sat in living room and visited. We had planned to see Mrs. Rodgers, too, but she was at prayer meeting. We left about 9. Betty has a bad cough that she got at Pickett and Mrs. Mildred was quite worried. So is Mum. Dishes and to bed. Betty is so funny the way the nods her head vigorously when agreeing with older people — she got back at me by saying I look away after I’ve said something just as if I were never going to speak another word! I know that that’s a bad habit with me — part of my self-consciousness — and heretofore I’ve never tried to correct it. But now I know I can. It’s wonderful — this new positive attitude!

Marcy S., age 16, Tennessee 
June 7, 1941

Nice. Bit more cloudy. Practiced a little in morning but got so tired decided not to take music lessons this summer. Went up to Helen’s in the afternoon and played with Fuddy as Barbara calls Fuzzy. It looked like rain. Cleaned up and about 4:00 Helen and I went to town. Stopped by and spoke to Mary. She was working in the sweet shop next to the Webbo while Viola took her place in the ticket office. It’s so they both won’t get too tired. Helen and I didn’t like the idea -- Mary shouldn’t stand long at all. Mary had her hair done up on top of her head and didn’t look like my Mary. But I can bear anything if only she can go to Oliphant with us.

From there to library. I got “Huckleberry Finn.” Helen tried for “Little Men” but it was out. “Tredged” home and I had no more than settled down to read than Mom came and drove me off to town with her so I could watch the money while she collected tickets. She had charge of the tickets for Kiwanis Club show “Little Men.” I read my book whenever we stopped. About 6:00 we started for home. I drove from Rockwell’s and got along fine. But I didn’t take any chances; I stalled the car in the middle of the street and let Mother take it to the curb. George laughed but I was quite proud of myself. He was polishing Tommy’s car (that is what George calls Mr. Tomilson -- his first name is Milton but he likes to be called “Tommy” and, although I don’t call him that in speaking, it is easier to write) and told me about the fishing jaunt he took the Jones boys on -- of course they didn’t catch anything. 

We didn’t finish supper till almost 7:00. I went out afterwards and there was a lovely breeze blowing the trees against the rushing black clouds. George was riding Harvey’s bicycle and finally George and I persuaded Helen to let me “ride.” I pedaled but George held the thing up and sorta guided it. I thus “rode” twice without mishap and learned how to stop. When Mom was ready we went up to call on Mrs. Rodgers and her visiting married daughter, Mary. The Lanes weren’t home so we sat in the side sun porch downstairs and it was lovely. Mary had not seen me for ten years. She is very nervous and doesn’t look exactly like a Rodgers somehow. Soon Mrs. Clure came to pay a farewell visit minus George, praises be! After visiting awhile Mrs. Rodgers and Mary served ice cold lemonade and chocolate cake. I ate it and enjoyed it. I don’t worry half as much about what I eat now as I used to. Mary is leaving at 3:50 from here in the morning and from Knoxville at 6:30 and will arrive in New York City sometime after midnight! A streamlined train -- but from here to New York in a day! time marches on! 

About 9:00 we left. It still looked like rain and sprinkled a bit going home. Daddy had washed the dishes. I curled my hair and to bed.

Aloys F., age 16, County Cork, Ireland
June 7, 1926

There were several pictures of the Procession in the ‘Examiner’ this morning. The crowd on the Parade looked immense. In one of the photos I come out behind the canopy bearer. Páp is mentioned in the account. A film of the whole thing was taken by the Washington management and will be shown soon. We must go to see it. – We were all very tired at school to-day. Dr. Scannell was very pleased with our part in the Procession. There was only one unfortunate incident, when a man who refused to take off his hat and smoked while the Blessed Sacrament was passing was attacked, and began to fight. The Civic Guards led him off, however. – To-day as it was raining Fr. Duggan let me take his bike round the school into the yard. I started it alright, but every time I released the gear-lever, no matter how much I shoved petrol forward, it stopped, so I had to walk it round. The air lever was cause, he told me afterwards. – Last Saturday a Bus Service began in Cork. They look quite well, and are cheap but are sure to bust the trams. We are getting quite continental now! – In reading Mozart at piano to-day I came across a minuet in Sonata 3, a delightful piece which has many old memories for me. Mr. Dalton, one of Mám’s pupils in days gone by used to play it. – Pa and Dickie are sick. I must begin to work hard from this out.

*(Original Archive Copyright © Estate of Aloys Fleischmann. The Fleischmann Diaries Online Archive by Róisín O’Brien is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. Used with permission.)

Henry S., age 26, Michigan 
June 7, 1888

I fixed the window holes in our room this forenoon, so Kate can put up the curtains. Studied Arithmetic some; am now in Percentage. This afternoon was the sale of shorthorn cattle at Boyden’s. Pa, Willie, and uncle Robert went there. I took Kate over to her fathers and then came home until supper time when I went after her, eating supper there. We are in need of rain now.

*(R. Henry Scadin Collection, D.H. Ramsey Library Special Collections, UNC Asheville)  

Henry S., age 25, Michigan 
June 7, 1887  

Kate did not come today.  I went up to the telegraph office at noon, but there was no word.  I am afraid she is sick, for I was sure she would come today.  I spent a good share of the day in piling up and burning the rubbish in the road on my side.  I hitched Jimmie to the stone-boat and went to the saw mill and got some lumber this afternoon, it made the little fellow puff to pull the load up the hill.  I went over and got 2 loaves of bread, which Mrs. Neill made for me today.  It has been another very warm day.  I do hope Kate will come tomorrow.  I don’t like this suspense.

*(R. Henry Scadin Collection, D.H. Ramsey Library Special Collections, UNC Asheville)  

Cornelia H., age 26, North Carolina 
June 7, 1863

Rather late breakfast this morning as all are lazy & sleepy every Sunday. Mr. Henry has gone up on Mt. Yaden to look after the fence as he wants to sow some buckwheat up there. Harrie in the front piazza reading the Bible. Willie off in the strawberry patch with Rose. Atheline has the baby in the strawberry patch. Pinck I guess is there too. Zona is down stairs going around generally I suppose. I am writing in Harrie’s room. The horses are grazing in the yard as it is getting a good pasture. There is preaching at Sardis today but none of us went. Aunt Tena went yesterday to the baptist church on Homeny. She will be back this evening. She began to dye the wool this week, will be sometime before it all gets done. She has none black yet. She is dying with white & black walnut bark. Jinnie is getting dinner. Pinck has some frogs for dinner. I wish potatoes & beans would soon come in. I am tired of so much onions & salad but ’tis all we can afford yet awhile. I will stop now as ’tis after 12 & dinner time.

*(Fear in North Carolina: The Civil War Journals and Letters of the Henry Family, Eds. Karen L. Clinard and Richard Russell, used with permission.)

Cornelia H., age 25, North Carolina 
June 7, 1862  

I did nothing of consequence this day. Atheline has got tollerable stout again. Mr. Henry & I took a long walk this evening through the wheat & by the Guy house. The blades on the wheat are all dead from rust. He thinks the wheat not injured yet. We went by the hotel place. Mr. Henry is having the dirt dripped where the smoke house was to try to make salt of the water. It tastes salty. Fannie baked some pies & custards this evening & boiled a ham. There is preaching at Sardis tomorrow, quarterly meeting.

*(Fear in North Carolina: The Civil War Journals and Letters of the Henry Family, Eds. Karen L. Clinard and Richard Russell, used with permission.)

Samuel P., age 34, London 
June 7, 1667  

Up, and after with my flageolet and Mr. Townsend, whom I sent for to come to me to discourse about my Lord Sandwich’s business; for whom I am in some pain, lest the Accounts of the Wardrobe may not be in so good order as may please the new Lords Treasurers, who are quick-sighted, and under obligations of recommending themselves to the King and the world, by their finding and mending of faults, and are, most of them, not the best friends to my Lord, and to the office, and there all the morning. At noon home to dinner, my father, wife, and I, and a good dinner, and then to the office again, where busy all the afternoon, also I have a desire to dispatch all business that hath lain long on my hands, and so to it till the evening, and then home to sing and pipe with my wife, and then to supper and to bed, my head full of thoughts how to keep if I can some part of my wages as Surveyor of the Victualling, which I see must now come to be taken away among the other places that have been occasioned by this war, and the rather because I have of late an inclination to keep a coach. Ever since my drinking, two days ago, some very coole drink at Sir W. Coventry’s table I have been full of wind and with some pain, and I was afraid last night that it would amount to much, but, blessed be God! I find that the worst is past, so that I do clearly see that all the indisposition I am liable to-day as to sickness is only the Colique. This day I read (shown me by Mr. Gibson) a discourse newly come forth of the King of France, his pretence to Flanders, which is a very fine discourse, and the truth is, hath so much of the Civil Law in it, that I am not a fit judge of it, but, as it appears to me, he hath a good pretence to it by right of his Queene. So to bed.

*(The Diary of Samuel Pepys M.A. F.R.S., edited by Henry B. Wheatley F.S.A., London, George Bell & Sons York St. Covent Garden, Cambridge Deighton Bell & Co., 1893.)

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